On that bombshell, let me introduce you to our 3 friendly neighborhood superheroes who are always ready to lend a helping hand (or shamelessly ask for one!)...I present to you...
Cave-Man!
Bio:
Stronger than the strongest...err...strong man, Cave-man is masculinity personified beyond belief! When he's not spending time at the gym working out or sleeping (or eating...a lot...of anything...even if it doesn't look edible...), he's almost always trying to impress the opposite sex. And boy oh boy...do the girls love him or what (...mostly the ones who want a pet Yetti or a very very hairy dog...)!
Weapon of Choice:
a) A bark of wood
b) Fruity Fart (sounds sweet...I can assure you, it is anything but!!)
Theme Song:
Very similar to the Bird-Man theme. For those of you who are not very familiar with this, hit this link and hear how they say..."Biiiiiiird-Man!". Replace the Biiiiiiird with Caaaaave...and voila! A theme that will send shivers down the spine of /any/ rodent! OKAY?
Note: Cave-Man does not have any of those cool gadgets or rays or any other stuff you see in that video; Just raw, pure...manly strength (and stench!).
Hamster-Boy!
Bio:
Looks can be deceptive. Strength is only fur deep. If ever anyone wanted a better example for these 2 very famous quotes (the 2nd one /IS/ famous...I promise you!!)...look no further than Hamster-boy! What he lacks in terms of sheer muscle/strength, he MORE than makes up with his awesomely powerful...ummm...err...buck-tooth! Yes! Those 2 small, insignificant, totally unintimidating but SHARP teeth of his can cause a LOT OF HARM...to your vegetables and fruits. And as you can see, he works out too...OKAY? It's just that it doesn't...ever...show.
Weapon of Choice:
a) Power-Run (he can EASILY out-run the enemies chasing him!)
b) Power-Bite (If those sharp teeth of his strike your body...you better run to the nearest pharmacy...to get some deodrant...because his saliva stinks!)
Theme Song:
He refused to pay his PR agency...and so, atleast for now, our beloved Hamster-boy doesn't have a theme. But he'll have one...soon...hopefully!
The Sloth!
Bio:
Yea...that's right, be afraid...be V E R Y afraid; he's a sloth and you're not! Exceptionally calm, cool and collected, The Sloth will never react...to anything...ever.Period. Some call him lazy, some call him extremely lazy and some are actually demanding that the word lazy be removed from our dictionaries and be replaced with The Sloth. But little to these tiny humans know, that The Sloth can...ummm...do nothing. But that doesn't mean he's useless okay? He can /ACT/ as if he has super powers and that's MORE than enough to scare most insects away! So who's stupid now hah?
Weapon of Choice:
a) NoThInGnEsS™ (Whoever thought doing NOTHING would be this powerful!)
b) Hyper-Sleep (Drop a bomb, piss on his face...he won't budge from his nap. Now THAT'S dedication and perseverance of a superhero for you!)
c) Yes...he has a 3rd weapon! The CLAAW (with 2 A's...he was told it'll bring him good luck!). With this weapon, he uses his claws to scratch off all the ticks/lies and other creatures off of his body and onto yours...all this, while sleeping!!
Theme Song:
While other superheroes have elaborate songs that praise them and their super-powers, The Sloth believes in taking a minimalist approach. That's originality for you I say! Kudos to The Sloth!
Together, these three form the Terribly Trepid Three! TTT!™
Tune in for the adventures of TTT!™...hopefully every weekend!
TTT!™ ...Why so stupid?©
*NOTICE: Any resemblance to any person living, dead, soon to die, in the process of dying or to-be-born is purely coincidental. The author of this blog will not take responsibility for any damage caused to your reputation (or increase in how much you get teased/ragged) as a result of this blog.
